I've been thinking a lot about the way that I perceive things and the way that my perception of something leads to my reaction to it. I really began to wonder why we perceive things the way we do and I realized that, at least in part, it really has to do with the way something is presented. If an idea is presented negatively, even though it might be the greatest thing on earth, the perception of that will be negative and so will the reaction. If another idea is presented positively, even though it might be the worst thing on earth, the perception of that will be positive and so will the reaction. That's why we have fraud. People can present bad things in a good way.
I've been thinking particularly of Paul's letters to the various churches. I wish I could have seen their reactions to Paul's words. Even though there are times when he is being very direct about their problems, there is a sense of truth filled with love. I'm sure not all the perceptions of what Paul had to say were positive and ended with a positive reaction, but I would guess that most of what he said was taken to heart - knowing that it was spoken in love with much grace.
In Galations, Paul is chastising the church for falling away so quickly and being so ready to accept another gospel. I would think that the "other" gospel being presented was being shown in a beautiful light and so the Galations perception was that it was good. Because it was good, they reacted to it positively. Therein lies the problem. I wonder if many of the problems that the Galation church faced were caused by this "other" gospel. Had they moved so far beyond what they had been taught that they had lost the fundamentals of what it meant to follow Christ? Galations is a tough book. Paul points out many areas where the Galations had fallen, yet even in that, there is grace behind his words. In Galations 5, Paul thanks the brothers for their previous concern for him and reminds them of the joy they had in that. He tells them how worried he is about them and even warns them of the change of tone that is coming in the remainder of the letter. Presentation can generate the perception, which can generate the reaction.
I thought for a long time that I couldn't change the way people perceived my words or my actions and that I couldn't influence their reaction to the perception. I was wrong. I can to a degree and it comes from being aware of the presentation.
On the flip side, I also must be aware of others presentation and know that my perception and reaction can be held in check if I am making the effort to understand.
I've also discovered that you must be careful in the way you present things to different people. If I know that the person I am presenting to has a sensitive nature, then I must be sensitive in my presentation. If I know, on the other hand, that the person is more thick skinned, then perhaps my presentation can be more blunt. But the key to this is making sure that your presentation is done with love and grace, regardless of the tone in which it is delivered.
Now, to this point, I've only been talking about words, but presentation can also come through actions. I must guard my actions to be sure that what I am presenting is God-honouring and therefore will be perceived as such and the reaction to that will be God-honouring. In the same way, I must make sure that I stop to think about how I perceive things and that my reaction to someone else's presentation is God-honouring. It is so easy to only think about the presentation and not worry about your own perception.
I'm working on this. I want people to perceive what I do and say in the way it was intended and I want what I do and say to be filled with love and grace. You can say the tough stuff with love. Then the perception and reaction will be taken with grace.
That's the difference. Truth with love. Truth with grace.
