Sunday, January 1, 2012

Nostalgia

I don't typically find New Years to be super nostalgic for me...generally that hits me in September when a new school year starts.  I think this year is probably different because of all the transition that has happened.  I've learned so much about myself, so many lessons that needed to be learned - some the hard way, some the easy way - but learned one way or the other.

I cleaned out my TV stand drawers and found my grade 12 grad video and my IBC grad video, so I decided to watch them...perhaps this is where that nostalgia comes from.  As I watched, I realized how quickly time has passed.  I graduated from high school almost 14 years ago!  Whoa!  Things certainly haven't gone the way I planned, but I've had so many wonderful opportunities that never would have happened if I had followed my own course.

The year I was at IBC, we had a choir for graduation.  As the music played (the cheesy synth shining through), I almost started to fast forward but decided it was worth a listen.  The chorus of the song was:

God is too wise to be mistaken
God is too good to be unkind
So when you don't understand
When you can't see his plan
When you can't trace his hand
Trust his heart

This year has been hard in many ways.  Sometimes I try to find the tracing of where God's hand is leading me and I simply can't.  This song reminded me that I am not always going to have the ability to know where God is leading me, but if I trust the heart of God to be wise and good, then the path I will be on will be one of faithfulness.

A few lessons learned this year:
  • Life is full of seasons, of joys and sorrows, letting go and holding on.
  • Boundaries are good.  Set them.
  • Honesty and faithfulness are keys to relationship. 
  • Sometimes God says no.  We might not know the reason, but that's where trusting his heart is so key.
  • I can't change the past.  
  • Love deeply.  Loss comes and that is part of life, so don't withhold love even when it hurts.
  • Worry ends where faith in God begins.  
I hope this year is filled with adventure.  I want to learn to rejoice in all things.  I hope that dreams will come true and God says yes. Not my will, but his be done.