Decisions, sunny rain, and the Lord's Prayer

So many thoughts have been running through my mind for the last few weeks. AND so much has happened, changed.

I chose to not take the job at Notre Dame...what a huge life altering decision that was. I could have taken a job that would have offered stability, a steady income and a position that would have lasted as long as I wanted it too - BUT it wasn't a job that would really make me happy. I've decided that I'd rather be happy than stable. I don't know if this is wise or not, but I truly feel at peace about this decision. The other reason that I decided not to take the job was a matter of integrity. I really want to go back to school. Notre Dame is looking for someone who wants to be an intregal part of their school for the long term. I don't think I'm ready to commit that to them. The dream of going back to school feels like it might actually be a reality for me now.

In the process of making that decision, I really felt reminded of the Lord's Prayer - and one verse inparticular. Christ teaches us to pray "Give us this day our daily bread". Just this day...not this week...not this year...not the next ten years. Just today. One of the main thoughts that kept coming at me was how much money I would make if I took the job. It's true that the money would have been very nice. I could live like a princess. But the money cannot be reason enough. I am now in a position of great instability where I will be wondering from month to month if I'll be able to make it. The great joy in that is I never have to worry. I look back at the last year and see all the ways that God took care of me - on a day-to-day basis. Everyday he gave me what I needed. Not once was I left without. Now, I'm not saying that God doesn't bring us stability or want us to have it. I know that I made a decision that was God-honouring and that he will provide because of it.

In the midst of all that, my favourite weather phenomenon (well, it might not be a phenomenon) of rain when the sun is shining has happened three times in the last week! I love the smell of rain and I love when the sun is shining. It's like the best of both worlds.

I think this sunny rain is a great analogy for life. Sometimes it feels like we're living in a time of rain, but if we really take a look at life, we'll discover that amidst the rain are many rays of sunshine - if we could just focus on them, then the rain wouldn't seem so dreary. Sometimes it isn't sunny at all when the rain is pouring, but the sun always comes out eventually. The rain never stays forever. Since I've moved into my house, I've really come to love the rain. It means I don't have to water my lawn or my flowers. Mother nature does it for me.

I'm resting in the truth that God is in control - of both the rainy days and the sunny days.