Sunday, April 24, 2011

Whispers to my Heart

I find that God speaks to my heart a lot through music, especially lyrics.  Sometimes, I will have heard the song a thousand times and sung it just as many, but for some reason a verse will catch my attention and speak right to my heart.  This morning, I was singing for worship and during the song "At the Cross", my heart was just overwhelmed with God's nearness.  The very first verse has been running through my head since service ended.

"Oh Lord, you've searched me
You know my ways
Even when I fail you
I know you love me"

I fail God everyday.  It seems the harder I try to not fail, the more I fail.  But, at the end of it, He still loves me.  Faults and all.  His love for me doesn't change even though I fail more consistently than I succeed.  He's searched every part of my being and knows all the things I do, both good and bad and yet, he still loves me.

Being that it is Easter, I have been thinking about how Jesus never fails me.  Right up to the moment on the cross when He could have called the angels to come and fight the battle, He held on for me.  Me.  What an overwhelming thought.  At the moment when Christ was dying, he was thinking of me.  He was thinking how much he loved me.  Me.  The one who fails him on a regular basis.  The one who has all sorts of good intentions but comes up short so often.  Someday, I will stand before Christ and even in all my failures, He will look at me with love and say, "Well done, my good and faithful servant".  He won't say them to me because I have been perfect and in my own perfection have come before him.  He will say them to me because I took His love, I wrapped myself in it and in even my smallest amount of belief, I understood that he loved me and because of that, He saved me. 

I jokingly said to some friends today after turning down a lunch invitation that everyday is an Easter celebration and we could have our own Easter next Sunday, but I realized just how true that is.  Since Christ died for me to cover my sins and since I fail daily, his sacrifice covers me everyday and I need to be as mindful of that sacrifice on an ordinary day as I am during the Easter weekend. 

Thank you, Lord, for dying for me.  Thank you that even though I fail you, you love me.  Help me to remember your sacrifice and to remember it daily.  May I be more mindful of it as I strive to be more like you.  Amen.

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