Fear

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything through prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to the Lord.  And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 4:6-7

Fear is a funny thing.  Often it is irrationally rationalized and the end result is that paralyzing realization that you are missing out, only you've left your decision so long that there is nothing you can do about it.

Fear is what stops me from having conversations that need to be had, from taking leaps of faith, and from discovering new and wonderful things.

I find myself wondering what would happen if I applied for the jobs I'm finding in Ontario and BC and just left this place.  What am I so afraid of?  What if instead of backing down from that really hard conversation, I spoke up and learned a little bit more about who I am, what I stand for and how to graciously and lovingly share what's on my heart even if it hurts for a moment?  What if I gave people that benefit of the doubt and realized that they do truly want to know my heart?

What if I realized that the twisted feeling in my stomach would go away and my pounding heart would slow if I would just learn to step out?  It must get easier with each time you decide to let faith overpower fear.

What if I truly believed that God's plan for my life was greater than my own and that if I just stop to listen, I'd know where my next step would be planted?  What if I let go of the control I hold onto for fear of not knowing what's coming?  What kind of amazing places would I visit, how many amazing people would I meet and how much would God's grace overpower that fear that holds me back?