Lessons Learned Over and Over...

How many times in life have you wanted to quit your job, sell your belongings, and move to Aruba?  The frequency of this thought has hit more times than I care to admit. The last couple of years have been filled with challenges, some of them overwhelming, but to be quite honest, as I look back on the past 3 years, I do see some valuable lessons that came because of them.

Lesson #1 - Letting go is not giving up.

• But it sure feels like it.  It also feels a lot like giving in. Sometimes the hardest part is the impression that what you worked so hard for was all in vain.  I admit that sometimes I really did throw my hands up in the air and say, "I QUIT!". But when the letting go actually did happen, it was from a completely different place.

Lesson #2 - Change is often a necessity

• Letting go brings some big changes, but often those changes are necessary and because of them, some really good things can happen. For example, I developed a musical theatre class, began conducting a ladies choir, started - and have almost completed - a master's program in Choral Conducting, transferred schools to a job I LOVE, and had the opportunity to sing in several diverse choirs. Letting go meant I had heart space for these new joys.

Lesson #3 - Relationships are hard

• I feel like this is a lesson I should have learned by now, but it seems to come up over and over again. A couple of years ago, I read a book called The 17 Indisputable Laws of Teamwork by John Maxwell and realized how much that book relates not only to work relationships, but relationships in general. Relationships don't just magically maintain themselves. They require nurturing and time. Sometimes deciding to let go of a relationship is as critical as holding on.

Lesson #4 - Eventually, you have to forgive yourself

• If you always feel like something is your fault, whether it is or not, you'll never get past it until you decide to forgive yourself. That's all I'm going to say about that :)

Lesson #5 - Growth is painful, but invaluable

• I've always wondered at the phrase "don't take this personally". It's a weird way to criticize someone. Criticism is personal, but for true growth, positive and pointed analysis and evaluation are essential. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes it is more than you can handle in the moment. The key is taking time to process the criticism to make room for growth. The value is in what is done with the assessment - both praise and admonishment - and in taking to heart the key aspects to make the growth possible.

Lesson #6 - Jump: The adventure is worth it

• I lead a very reserved, generally guarded, life. I choose my circle of trust very carefully. I make decisions based on a lot of thorough, rational thought, with a constant dialogue of angles and possibilities. But sometimes, this cautious approach needs to be loosened for the adventure to happen. And when it does, it feels like flying. I've had a couple of adventures the last few years. And when I look back, I'm grateful.

I'm sure there are many more lessons I've worked through, but these are the big ones, the ones I still see popping up constantly. I'm getting there. I'm just a little guarded in the process :)